Photo by D Sharon Pruitt

Nurturing yourself

We’ve all been here before – stressed out, tired, no pizzazz left.  How do we get back the joy – to that fun loving, happy-go-lucky, free spirited person we used to be?

Do you want more joy in your life?  It begins with accepting you can’t be supermom.  No one expects it from you.  You are the one putting the pressure on yourself.  You don’t need to do it all.  You don’t need to be an expert gardener, supreme baker, creative crafter, home project do-it-yourselfer, gourmet chef, Mrs. Cleaver organizer and coupon clipper.  You don’t need to do it all, and obviously can’t do it all.  But we put so much pressure on ourselves to accomplish it all.

Just being you is what your family needs.

You need to decide what is important to you, decide the things you want to focus on and most importantly know the things you are not going to do.

When we feel like we have to be super spectacular at everything we do, and take on more and more responsibilities – that’s when it starts. That is when the fatigue – the stress – the overwhelmingness of it all starts to set in.

 When I started feeling out of balance I knew I had to make changes.  Something that is so important and has been such a positive change for me has been scheduling free time for me.  It’s actually on the calendar – MY DAY!  After getting married and having children it had been quite a few years before I took some free time to myself.  A few years?  That sounds so crazy to me now!  And when I finally did take some free time I felt like a new woman!

I need some “white space” in my head.  Managing a household, raising two boys, being a good wife – my brain was on overload – I lost touch with the real me.

Scheduling a day for myself gives me the white space I need to relax, focus on my needs, plan goals for the future.  All of which I can’t do while juggling the hub-bub of daily mommy life.

Nurturing your relationships

Your friends are there for you thick and thin.  They are there for the fun times – the weddings, the babies – the real joys of life.  They can also be there for the valleys – the meltdowns in your life too. 

So many times we put on a shinny, happy, plastic face.  Everything’s good over here!  While you are just dying inside – all stressey and feeling bad. 

Do you find yourself only calling your friends when you are in a good mood – or having a great day?  Try this – the next time you are in the middle of a meltdown – call one of your good friends.

Perhaps she’s never heard from you in a meltdown type sobbing state.  But she is your friend.  She is there for you.  And you, you’re having a meltdown – these things happen.  But be real about it, let your friends in, let them know the real you.   Your friendship will grow from it.

Your friend will be so happy to be there for you – to be that shoulder you need.  She will offer fresh perspective – maybe even get you to laugh in the midst of your meltdown like my good friend did for me!

Connect with friends – don’t hallow away.  It takes time and effort to stay connected, but your life will be filled with more joy having these relationships in them.

It’s hard to be a good mom if you don’t take care of yourself first.  Reconnect with yourself, reconnect with your friends.  Take better care of yourself.  Realize when things are getting out of control.  You’re never going to be 18 again – but you can get back in-touch with that free spirit you had then and incorporate that joy into your daily life now. 

-          Helping you achieve your Domestic Success!